Yuppie Birthday Parties

When I was a kid, we had simple birthday parties. A cake, maybe a pin the tail on the donkey, often under someone's carport, with makeshift tables set up. A few cheap paper conical hats perhaps.

Now that I have 2-year old, and live in a big city with a bunch of yuppie breeder friends, a trend that I had only been dimly aware of is starting to manifest itself more clearly to me. It's now routine for parents to have over-the-top birthday parties, inviting dozens of kids with any connection to their own--neighbors, classmates, what have you. I know parents who have to go to 3 or more such parties in a given weekend. I went to one this morning myself; and am having another at my own house this afternoon (but family only, thank God).

The kids love it. It's often done off-site, at a place like Gymboree, or an indoor soccer stadium, or indoor playground (Houston is HOT in the summer), with various personnel hired to entertain the kids--clown, referee, "poodle lady", whatever. Catered food, for both kids and adults. I am not sure if they try to outdo each other, but they are sure lavish. And now it's standard to provide "party favors"--little parting gifts for the kids attending, so they don't feel "left out". Aww, we are so careful not to bruise their precious little egos nowadays, aren't we?

The worst thing, as my wife pointed out, is the kids don't even open their gifts there--it's like a wedding reception, with tons of loot piled on a table somewhere, to be opened later, with thank you cards duly mailed out. Ridiculous.

However, if there are at least 2 milfs present, it helps ease the pain.